Hello again
I've missed you
This back and forth between me and my computer screen
Where my words appear
As if by magic
But it's really nothing more complex than my fingers moving on a keyboard
I haven't voiced myself lately
Too much nothingness inside
Both inside my head and my heart, it's amazing how simple I've turned out to be
I find music switches me off
As does sex and reading
And I have to be switched off otherwise I'm simply too much
Although I've never known why
I view myself as not enough
But apparently that not enough has a form of intensity that I am oblivious to
Always told to calm down
And that I should take a chill pill
But I haven't even started to lose my calm or get worked up about anything
I want to get worked up
I need to feel something more
For right now all I can find is a numbness that spreads inside like frost
I was born in winter
And I can't stand heat
However that does not mean that I want to be cold inside.